Tuesday, October 20, 2009

list of qoutes {in progress}

  • you are one of my bestest friends... and that's why I have 911 on speed dial.
  • If toast lands butter-side down and cats land on their feet, what happens when you strap a piece of toast to the back of a cat and drop it?
  • Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor the devil says "Oh crap. She's up!"
  • Be the change you wish to see in the world.
  • Who needs drugs? I go broke on books.
  • We're the type of friends that don't know why their laughing so we laugh harder.
  • I didn't hit you, I high-fived your face.
  • A computer once beat me at a game of chess. But it was no match for me at kickboxing.
  • I noticed that everybody who is for abortion has already been born.
  • Frogs are cool. they go RIBBIT.
  • By the time you finish reading this you realize you have wasted 5 seconds of your life.
  • Hobos can't use calculators because mice can't drive potatoes that crush houses, DANG IT! We're having salad for dinner, I hate crab...
  • Mess with me fine I can handle it. Mess with my friends, and you WILL bleed.
  • Don't play stupid with me. I always win.
  • Sometimes you just need to dance down the aisles of the grocery store.
  • I'm the girl who can watch tons of horror movies and not get scared, but scream at the top of my lungs when toast pops out of the toaster.
  • tlk t0 m3 l!3k th!5... And I'll shoot you in the face.
  • my imaginary Friends think you have serious problems...
  • I'm not mean, I just say what most people keep in their heads.
  • HAHA. wait what?
  • knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in fruit salad.
  • I'm not random you just can't think as fast as me.
  • Just so you know. If an ugly guy was ever hitting on you I'd pretend to be your lesbian lover.
  • I smile cause I have no Idea whats going on. :)
  • When i die I want to go peacefully like my grandpa did, in his sleep. Not screaming like the passengers in his car.
  • Friends will help you when you fall. Best friends will laugh and say "Walk much, smart one?"
  • Caution: This sign has SHARP EDGES do not touch the edges of this sign. Also the bridge is out ahead.
  • Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
  • EVERYONE has a WILD side but me and my girls PREFER to make ours Public
  • It's not about the ones who act true to you face; it's about the ones who REMAIN true BEHIND YOUR BACK
  • who is this 'life' and why does he throwing lemons at people? It probably hurts.
  • A guy walks into a bar... ouch.
  • I love to laugh at boys who get hurt while trying to impress girls.
  • THINK! it's not illegal yet.
  • Sometimes I think "Why is that Frisbee getting bigger?" And then it hits me
  • Okay so... theres this thing called retarded-ness and me & my girls well... we've gone pro.
  • NEVER underestimate the crazyness of VERY bored teenage girls... EVER!
  • I promise never to confuse you by making sense.
  • Why do sleeping pills have warning labels that say" warning may cause drowsiness?
  • A good friend comforts you when he rejects you, but a best friend will walk up to him & say; "It's because your gay isn't it?"
  • Things to do at walmart #3 climb on top of one of the shelves and declare yourself king/queen of walmart.(when your arrested do not blame this quote.)
  • Life's a BITCH 'cause if it were a SLUT it'd be EASY.
  • Yes you have the right to your opinoin and I have the right to think you're stupid.
  • GOOD FRIENDS help you up when you fall. BEST FRIENDS are on the floor with you, laughing at you.
  • CAUTION: water on road during rain.
  • Crazy people are just more fun.
  • Dehydrated water: just add water!!!
  • never take anyone for granted. Hold every person close to your heart because you might make up one day and realize you've lost a diamond while you were busy collecting stones.
  • It's not that chocolate is a substitute for love. Love is a substitute for chocolate. And lets face it. Chocolate is far more reliable than any man.
  • If zombies attack and you trip me I;m coming after you in the next life.
  • Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery and Today is a gift. that's why they call it the present
  • Jonas Brothers' Music: the number one cause of brain cancer.
  • Things to do at walmart #140: Stand in front of the doors and tell People to inter through the exit doors because it's opposite day.
  • Things to do at walmart # 50: Ask a teen male employee if he can show you the tampons.

5 comments:

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  4. I am assuming that you made up most of these quotes. If that is true, I hate to see what you are realy like.

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  5. Oh, THAT was nice! And those were good quotes too. :(

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